Tag Archives: Bullying

“Guest Blog” Miss Piggy, The Story of a Bullied Girl

Posted in Self-Esteem by

I am originally from Eastern Europe. I came to America 7 years ago. I was bullied and emotionally tortured by the popular kids in my classes. This affected my self-esteem and my mental health already shaken by genetics (my mother suffered with anxiety and agoraphobia.) At 16 years old, I developed a severe case of generalized anxiety and depression. There was not much help for those bearing mental struggles, only strong sedatives.

I wish I could have been able to see a trained therapist and talk about my feelings at school with a school counselor. I wished at that time, that the Principal would listen and act against the bullies. It did not happen. I felt very lonely through it all. I promised myself to somehow see that no student feels this way in the future.

This is an excerpt from my diary during the high school years. I was bullied daily. What’s really sad is that my self-esteem was so bad. I truly believed that I am worthless. I was convinced that I deserve to be teased that way. I felt that it is my fault that THEY laughed at me!  I was mad at myself for not having the will power to lose weight.

Wed., May 15th 

Dear diary, New nick name

I am in the bathroom eating my lunch. Lately, this is the only place I can eat. Why? Simply stated: How can I eat this huge sandwich that can hardly fit into my mouth and not get teased? Also, today I have in my lunch 2 croissants filled with chocolate and 2 candy bars. It’s totally my fault!  Someone like me should bring no lunch, or maybe some veggies and fruit.

Yesterday THEY gave me a new nick name. I’m not “The Whale” anymore. I guess they got bored calling me “Whale” so I take it as a promotion. My new nick name is “Miss Piggy.” The one who called me that first, was “kind” enough to give me the explanation, as well.

He said: “Obviously Miss Piggy is fat, just like you. She has the thick, blond and fluffy hair, he said, the chubby nose, and when she laughs she throws her head on the back just like you do.”  Well, at least now I know where  it’s coming from. Honestly, I don’t recall laughing lately in front of THEM. I avoid laughing, because one of THEM told me that when I laugh my double chin wiggles. I got home that day and looked in the mirror. I pretended to laugh, while watching my double chin do that little dance. My 85-year-old grandmother thought I lost it. She asked me to stop laughing in the mirror or she will call my parents at work. I stopped.

Thursday, May, 16th

Dear diary,

My life sucks!

Yesterday while I was in the bathroom, devouring my second croissant some girl from my class asked me why I’m eating there. I told her the truth…as if it wasn’t obvious…she rushed out and a few minutes later 2 guys crushed into the girl’s bathroom and took a picture of me stuffing my face. I wonder what they are going to do with the picture?

I want to disappear. I don’t want to kill myself. I just want to become invisible. Some people complain about being “invisible.” Well, for me that would be the cure for my disease.

Monday (no date)

Dear diary,

I am on the bus on the way to school. I have that weird feeling in my stomach, that feeling you get when you sense something will go wrong.

Later that day…

I can’t believe it! Pictures of me eating in the bathroom are everywhere. On the picture it is written with sharpie: Miss Piggy eating in the stinky bathroom…gross!

I feel like I want to run, but where am I going to run? It is all my fault! If I would be skinny they would not treat me this way!

Top Ten Stressors for the Average Teenage Girl

Posted in General Health, Self-Esteem by

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The top ten stressors for the average teenage girl come in many forms. Some may surprise you and some may not, but what they all have in common is a damaging effect on teen self-esteem.

Body Image— How she sees herself, how she compares herself to her friends, and the complications of eating disorders.

Boys/relationships–Wanting a boy or girl to like her, but not necessarily understanding how to go about it a healthy or positive way. Romanticizing the concept of a relationship.

Bullying— Wearing the scars from being bullied in middle school or junior high that never seem to fully go away. Worrying that she will be bullied again.

Friends— Wanting to be popular and having a group of friends, yet still worrying about being fully accepted by them.  Fitting in and knowing how to conform, but wondering about individuality.

Gossip— Worrying about being judged by others, but at the same time judging them. Worrying about rumors that may or may not be true & people cutting you down.

Media Beauty Ideals— Scanning magazines and websites, teens take cues from what the media considers beautiful. This in turn causes self hate if they don’t meet those physical ideals set by society.

Parents— Expectations put upon them by their parents, having a poor relationship with one or both of their parents and/or being compared to a sibling.

Peer pressure — Wanting to be part of the group, but not wanting to drink, do drugs, shoplift or have unwanted sexual encounters to be accepted.

Perfectionism/self-image— Setting unrealistic expectations for themselves. Unsure of how others actually see them and of  how they want to be seen in relation to school, culture and society. Always questioning who they are and striving  to be “perfect.”

School— Getting good grades and getting into the college of her choice, wondering if she’s smart enough, and comparing her grades to her friends.

Sexual Harassment at Schools | AAUW

Posted in General Health by

The American Association of University Women is one of those great organizations dedicated to helping women. They offer annual reports on research that they have conducted, they post insightful  articles, offer scholarship and fellowship funding for young women to attend college and just all around serve as a very credible source of information for women today. Having worked on college campuses for the past 16 years, they were always a source of information for me. Their most recent report is about sexual harassment on high school campuses. Prior to reading the report, I had no idea how prevalent sexual harassment was among high schoolers.  In addition, the report break down the differences between bullying and sexual harassment so that we have a clear understanding of the two and how they differ.  Harassment occurs in all forms; boys harassing girls, boys harassing boys, as well as girls harassing girls. The AAUW also describes  in this report the different forms of harassment that occur today among our youth in detail with proven statistics.  I highly encourage educators of middle school and high school students to read the report.  The more informed we are, the better prepared we become to handle these situations and take care of our youth.

Crossing the Line: Sexual Harassment at Schools | AAUW.