3 Great Ways Mothers Can Motivate Their Teens

 familytime

Mothers and the Frustration of Teenage Motivation

Guest blog by Rebecca Temsen

Raising a teenager can be quite a frustrating experience for any mother. Teens can often be extremely rebellious. It can be hard for parents to provide them with proper direction. Teens often don’t want to listen to anything their parents have to say. They tend to be more partial to the thoughts and opinions of their peers. If you’re a concerned mother who wants to motivate your child to do great things in this world, these tips may be able to guide a path for you. Strong personal development for kids is invaluable in this day and age. Parents should always work hard to encourage positive thinking for kids.

  1. Give Your Teenager an Incentive

Teenagers are just like other normal human beings. They work better when they have clear and defined incentives. That makes a lot of sense, too. If you want to motivate your teen to do well, you have to help him understand what he may get out of it. Teenagers don’t usually feel compelled to do things that don’t have any desirable outcomes. It doesn’t matter if you want to encourage your teen to study harder at school or if you want to encourage him to work harder at a specific hobby. You should make the potential positive outcome abundantly clear. It can’t hurt to help the cause if at all possible, either. If you want your teen to do well on an upcoming science test, tell him that you’ll let him go on a weekend trip with his closest friends. Human beings tend to thrive when they have exciting incentives dangling in front of them.

  1. Challenge Your Teenager

It’s no mystery that teens love incentives. It’s also no mystery, however, that they’re often up for good challenges. Failure doesn’t intimidate them as much as they do to adults. Teens often lack motivation due to boredom. If a teen doesn’t feel like doing anything, it may be simply because she doesn’t sense any type of challenge. If you want to motivate your teenager to excel in her studies, make a bet with her. Tell her that you don’t think she can do better than the rest of her friends. That statement may just encourage her to get busy reading her textbooks. Teenagers don’t like feeling “stupid.” They don’t like feeling like they’re predictable, either.

  1. Discuss the Future

If a teen doesn’t have any motivation, it could be because he doesn’t link his current actions to the future. If you’re a mother who wants your teen to take the direction of his life seriously, discuss the future with him. Make sure he understands that his actions at the moment directly influence what happens next in his life. That insight may be enough to get him thinking and active.

Conclusion

So there you have it. Those are 3 simple yet very effective ways you can motivate your teenage kid. Keep in mind that most of what a teenager learns will help form them as adults. So it is your responsibility to get the best out of your child!

 

Author’s Bio:

Rebecca Temsen is an author, entrepreneur and most of all a wife and mother of 2. What she enjoys the most is helping normal people reach their full potential. Rebecca uses her ever growing skills in writing to inspire people and not settle for a normal life. As an entrepreneur, she has no shortage of failures and that is why Rebecca is the ideal person to talk about this. http://www.selfdevelopmentsecrets.com

Advertisements

Trade in the “Time-out” for Meditation and Reflection

I’m a firm believer in meditation and it’s many forms. When talking about children, imagesmeditation can simply be a moment of silence, deep breathing, or just lying still on a rug.  This can be the start for building a great mediation practice.

I think more schools should look toward meditation as a preventative method to deter negative behavior and deal with disciplinary issues. Meditation helps balance ones’ breathing which naturally calms the system. After meditating and opening their eyes, kids are more alert, rejuvenated and ready to get back to work.  Mediation teaches focus that can help kids through the rest of their school day. And if used as a form of disciple instead of detention, a child will emerge less aggressive and more reflective.

I think parents could utilize meditation in the home as well. Putting a child in “time-out” really doesn’t do much more than create frustration, boredom or anxiety.  Kids end up counting the seconds, simply waiting for the time out to be over and they can sometimes emerge from the “time-out” angrier than they went into it. They don’t learn from the experience.

A preventative method for parents would be to start the day with your child doing a short meditation practice in the morning. It will set the day off right and produce a more aware, calm and focused child.  Overtime, this may cut down the need for punishment (or the time-out) by creating a more self-aware, mindful and relaxed child.

Teaching Your Child To Learn From Failure: 4 Steps To Success

Guest blog by: Rebecca Temsen (http://www.selfdevelopmentsecrets.com)

The old adage holds true: We learn from our mistakes. Making mistakes is especially how childrenteengirl learn. Unfortunately, too many kids (and even some adults) have never learned the value of making a mistake. I plead guilty too.

Too many fail to realize successful people find new routes to their goals and they don’t let setbacks derail them. Succeeding ultimately depends on sticking with their efforts and not letting setbacks hold them down, especially with kids.

Here are some tips for helping children recognize that mistakes don’t necessarily mean failure but instead can be learning opportunities in disguise.

  1. Stress that it’s okay to make mistakes

The very first step is helping kids realize that mistakes aren’t the end of the world is to simply say, “It’s okay to make a mistake.” By giving kids permission to fail and helping them recognize that mistakes can be positive learning experiences, we are opening the door to success later in life. Let them know that even the most successful people makes mistakes. When is the last time you told your child, “It’s okay to make a mistake in our house?”

  1. Admit your own mistakes

Whether you know it or not, your child sees you as all-knowing and all-powerful. Obviously, grownups make mistakes, too, but too often we hide them from our children and spouses. Don’t let the ‘duck syndrome‘ take control of your life. Admit your errors to your kids. It helps them recognize that everyone, even Superhero Dad or Wonder Woman Mom, mess up sometimes — and that’s okay. Keep in mind, though, that they’re also watching to see how you handle failure. 

  1. Show acceptance for mistakes

Whenever your child goofs up, show your support with both your nonverbal reactions and your words. The fastest way your children will learn to toss the idea that mistakes are the most horrible thing in the world is to allow them to feel their parents’ accepting responses to their errors.

  1. Tell your children how you overcame the obstacle

When you make an error, tell your child not only your mistake but also what you learned from it. If, for example, your dinner menu was a failure, first admit the mistake to your family quickly before they tell you themselves, and then say what you learned from the mistake. Here’s what this would look like:

“I sure messed up this recipe. I learned that I should always read the whole recipe first before adding the broccoli.”

Did your children witness you running late for work? Here’s how that conversation might go:

“I was late for work because I lost my keys. I learned I need to put them in the same place every time I come home so that I can find them when I need them.”

Use this template for your own conversations with your kids. When your child makes a mistake, ask him or her, “What was your mistake?” Follow up by saying, “What did you learn?”

Conclusion

Make mistakes be acceptable in your house. Stress that everyone — adults and children — make mistakes and that no one is perfect. Mistakes are how we learn. Emphasize over and over: “Don’t worry about your mistakes. Instead, think about what you’ll do differently next time.”

If we help kids learn from them, mistakes can be valuable lessons. Once your children realize failures aren’t the end of the world, they’ll be more likely to hang in there and not give up.