Megan is a 17 years old teen girl who sees her self-esteem as moderate to low. She was an obese child in grammar school and lost 40 pounds by eating healthy and swimming regularly. She was bullied and teased relentlessly because of the weight. That had a very damaging effect on her. She then swung the pendulum in the complete opposite direction and between eighth-grade and freshman year of high school she became anorexic. As an anorexic, she counted calories and every chew. To this day she needs someone to distract her when she’s eating or she will count the calories and not eat enough. She also suffers from depression, which was obvious to me from the start of the interview. I’d say Megan was the saddest girl I interviewed for this book. She smiled once during the whole interview, and that was when I asked her what made her happy. Her response to me was “food” with a dreamy smile on her face.She has an unhealthy love affair with food. Her family situation is far from ideal, like many girls her deal with eating disorders. She has no relationship with her father, literally. Her parents are still married, although it seems they shouldn’t be based on her story. They all live in the same house, which seems to act like a prison for her mother. It seems to be a very depressing environment. She said that she learned a long time ago that it’s not worth trying to please her dad because it’s impossible. For years she tried and only failed over and over again in her father’s eyes. She clearly identifies the eating disorder and depression as directly related to her father. Or rather, the lack of relationship with her father. She talked about how cruel kids can be and how she would never bully anyone because she knows what it feels like firsthand. She identifies and hangs out with a group of girls who “could be” considered bullies at her school. I’m assuming this is a strategy or defense so that she herself would never be bullied by them. She still struggles with her relationship with food and has very poor body image. When she looks in the mirror she still sees that obese child. She sees a therapist weekly and takes antidepressants. She still laments for the time when she was anorexic.
Category Archives: Girl Talk: Boys, Bullies and Body Image
Hi Everyone, This section of the blog will be dedicated to the progress I make on my book “Girl Talk: Boys, Bullies and Body Image.” It may at times read like a “Dear Diary” as I share with you all some of the highlights from my interviews with the teen girls I meet and share with you some of their thoughts and feelings as they relate to self-esteem. I am so fortunate to be working with many high schools and teens in San Francisco on my research for this book. Every school culture is different. So as you can imagine, so are the thoughts and feelings of the girls that I interview. I hope for this book to be about their journey through high school and many of the obstacles, and in some cases difficult challenges that they face as teens.
My Journey Writing a Book on Teen Self-Esteem
So….I’ve been interviewing girls from a variety of high schools in the San Francisco Bay Area for my book roughly 2 months now. I’m truly enjoying the process and appreciate that the schools are allowing me in and that the girls are comfortable and (hopefully) honest with the information they share with me. Some of the information is very insightful, enlightening, and sometimes surprising. I’ve spoken with some teen girls where I never wanted the interview to end. Other times it was almost painful, trying to find something that connected with them and that they wanted to talk to me about. For those girls, I wonder “why did you choose to do this interview?’ I have been blown away by their openness and sometimes by their innocence. It’s completely contrasting to talk to a girl who is academically bright and can name for me her top 5 college choices while only in her sophomore year, yet in the next sentence asks me if I think she’s fat. I’ve been pleasantly surprised by their wisdom, their concern for the environment and the well-being of others in war torn countries. While I’ve also been angered by their lack of self value and their unwillingness to stand up for what is right.
But this is a journey and there are many more girls for me to interview. I look forward to being surprised, disappointed, enlightened and sometimes saddened each and every time. Thank you
My Journey Writing a Book Called “Girl Talk.”
| Hi Everyone, This section of the blog will be dedicated to the progress I make on my book “Girl Talk.” It may at times read like a “Dear Diary” as I share with you all some of the highlights from my interviews with the teen girls I meet and share with you some of their thoughts and feelings as they relate to self-esteem. I am so fortunate to be working with many high schools and teens in San Francisco on my research for this book. Every school culture is different. So as you can imagine, so are the thoughts and feelings of the girls that I interview. I hope for this book to be about their journey through high school and many of the obstacles, and in some cases difficult challenges that they face as teens. |
Dr Carol 