Category Archives: Tip of the Week

How Many Colleges Should I Apply to?

Posted in College Guidance, Self-Esteem, Tip of the Week by

I’m pretty old-school when it comes to this question having worked at colleges for the past 17 years. Personally, I recommend 7. Two “reach” schools, three mid-range schools, and two “safety” schools.

A “reach” school is a school that you would love to attend, but you’re not quite sure you have the chops to get in. Maybe, your SAT is a bit lower than their average SAT. Or, maybe your high school GPA is a bit lower than the average applicant. Whatever the reason, I still encourage students to shoot for the stars (within reason) and not discard two top choice schools because of one thing missing from their background/application.

Mid-range schools are schools that fall within your academic background, offer the major you want to study and all around provide an environment/campus that you’d be happy attending. A mid-range school is not a slam-dunk, but there is a very strong chance that you will get in based on your background, fit and academics.

A “safety” school is pretty much self-explanatory based on the name. It’s a school that you are confident that you will get into based on your academic profile and background. Make sure that the safety schools you pick are still schools you’d be happy to attend. Don’t think of them as some sort of last resort, because they aren’t. Many students attend their safety school because of location, convenience and/or cost.

Before applying, be sure that you would be comfortable attending any/all of the universities that you have selected and do not put all your hopes into one school. That can sometimes,be a recipe for disaster and why put yourself in that position.

Helping Your Teen Choose the Right College

Posted in Articles for Parents, College Guidance, Tip of the Week by

Having worked in higher education for 17 years, people are always asking me: “What do you consider to be the most important factor for students to consider when making their final college choice?”  I don’t think I can ultimately narrow that decision down to one factor, but I can narrow it down to the top 2 most important factors. I call these factors fit and finances.

When I say fit, I’m referring to the school matching your initial criteria that was important to you at the beginning of your search. Some of these factors may have been proximity to home, size of campus, your major as well as campus facilities. Fit also includes those unknown factors that you only discovered once you’re able to see the college campuses, talk to the students as well as the staff.  Sometimes, when we walk on a campus there are these unknown factors that end up being just as important. Such as, how helpful or accommodating are the administrative offices such as financial aid and the registrar. Or, how approachable are the faculty in your major and do they have flexible office hours. Lastly, there are also those intangibles such as the “feel” of the campus. (i.e. How happy are the students and are they fully engaged with the campus?) The  “feel” of the campus can come from your gut and sometimes it can’t be explained, but college campus either gives you a good feeling, no feeling, or a bad feelings. Always listen to what your gut is telling you when making that final decision along with the other criteria mentioned above.

The 2nd factor I refer to is finances. There’s nothing worse than a student attending the college of his/her dreams only to find out during their sophomore or junior year that the school is too expensive for them and/or their parents to afford so they need to transfer elsewhere. Be well aware prior to accepting your number #1 college choice, of all the costs associated with attending that institution. If financial aid, grants and loans still don’t put a dent in the tuition, meal plan and housing costs then the school is just too expensive for you to afford. This is where parental guidance can be critical because  as an 18 or 19-year-old wanting to go off to college sometimes their heart can overrule their head. Parents need to help ground their children and help them understanding the costs associated with higher education. Also, parents and students need to remember that sometimes grants and scholarships guaranteed during freshman year may or may not be guaranteed for the remaining 3 years. I recommend using a spreadsheet or a wipe board for plotting out the pros and cons of your top choices. Again, always keeping in mind fit as well as finances.

5 Tips For Parents on Talking to Your Teen

Posted in General Health, Tip of the Week by

Parents typically ask me to tell them what they should do (or could do) better in regards to strengthening their relationship/communication with their teen. So, I thought I’d pull together the top 5 things that teens mention about their communication or lack of communication with their parents that actually bothers them.

Parents,

1) Take the time to “listen” to your teen.  Many teens tell me that they don’t tell their parents certain things (bigger issues) because they will literally not remember. This can be crushing for a teen and once it happens, they will not open up and make that same mistake again.  Parents please be engaged. Look at your teen when they are talking to you and show that you are interested in what they have to say.

2) Know your teen’s friends. This is critical. Some of your teen’s friends are good influences and some are bad. Meet them all and know who your teen is spending time with after school and on weekends.  At the very least, meet the parents and have a cordial relationship with them if you aren’t already acquaintances. That way looking out for your teens becomes a shared effort.

3) Talk to your child during other times, not just during dinner.  Many of the teens I speak with say that dinner is basically the time their parents engage with them. Teens aren’t stupid. They can feel when the questions seem forced or even rushed because you still have a million things to do later.  They aren’t telling you anything of significance over dinner– trust me.

4) There is more to talk about than just school. Almost ever teen tells me that their parents always ask about school or the generic “How was your day?” question.  Parents, don’t play it safe all the time. Ask specific questions about their friends, pressures, stress, boys, anxiety. Teens are perceptive. They can tell when you really don’t want to hear the tough answers so they give you the “everything is fine” routine.  Don’t buy it.

5) Sometimes when your teen doesn’t want to talk…. they just don’t feel like talking.  Remember what is was like being 16? It doesn’t necessarily mean that anything is wrong.  The more you push, the most they will retreat. Give it a few days and see if the withdrawing still occurs. If it does then press the issue, but not at the dinner table.